Sunday, September 22, 2013

Emmy Awards 2013 live blog

Well, you nailed it with your predictions of the Best Drama but the 33% of you who named Big Bang Theory for Best Comedy ruined it for the 32% who tipped Modern Family.

"This may be the saddest Emmys of all time but we could not be happier," says the Modern Family creator.

It's not clear exactly what he's digging at there but the response in the room is muted and a bit cold.

He also thanks the gym teachers and bullies from school, without whom "we never would have gone into comedy."

Will is applauding the speech. Then he wont' let his "son" go to the bathroom.

And the Emmy goes to: Breaking Bad

Chemistry: Walt (Bryan Cranston) and Jesse (Aaron Paul) watched by drug boss Gus (Giancarlo Esposito).

NPH promises these are the last awards of the night as he introduces Will Ferrell.

Will is in t-shirt and shorts and has brought three children with him. He appears to have had a baby sitter crisis.

"They called me literally 45 minutes ago. I couldn't find child care. It doesn't matter, it's great to be here."

This is a bit of a running gag as Ferrell had his secret wife with him at another awards.

And the Emmy goes to: Modern Family

A scene from the TV series Modern family.

Cranston and Danes get to do another award. And it's another gimme at this point.

And the Emmy goes to: Behind the Candelabra

"This was a two-hander" says Douglas which given the subject-matter of the biopic gets a bit of a laugh.

"And you're only as good as your other hand, so Matt, you deserve half of this. Do you want the bottom or the top?"

That gets a bigger laugh and we learn that Matt would choose top.

Then it gets serious.

He thanks his children, and particularly his older son Cameron "I hope they'll allow me to see him soon."

He gives a shout out to Lee (Liberace).

He does not mention Catherine Zeta-Jones.

"I smell a three-way" says NPH as he introduces Bryan Cranston and Claire Danes who play two of the darker characters on TV.

"Congratuations for your win by the way" says Bryan. Claire goes to return the compliment before realising he didn't win. Awkward.

"I've still got my fingers crossed for my category" quips Cranston. Nice.

And the (least surprising) Emmy goes to: Michael Douglas (Behind the Candelabra)

Sodebergh is short and sweet, like a man who has received significantly higher acclamation for this movie.

"No matter what we all did ... if Michael and Matt don't turn up with those performances we don't have a movie, so gentleman I thank you. Salut."

Then another award.

And the Emmy goes to Ellen Burstyn

Fox8 reminds us all that these are the primetime Emmys but we sure aren't getting prime time ads.

And now, back to the reason we're all here.

And the Emmy goes to: Steven Soderbergh (Behind the Candelabra)

Michael Douglas as Liberace in a scene from Behind the Candelabra.

Michael Idato: OUR MAN IN THE ROOM

Loved the "in memoriam". Deborah Raffin, Julie Harris, Jack Klugman, Larry Hagman. So many awesome, luminous stars lost this year.

Um. James Cromwell's wife is Donna Love from Another World. Andy Mercado, did you see that?

The Hour? Fark. They're right. No one is winning their #Emmy ballot.

The Colbert Report. To be candid, not as good as Dynasty II: The Colberts of California.

The president of the Emmys and Kaley Cuoco from The Big Bang Theory come on stage to tell us what the organisatoin does.

Kevin Spacey takes a moment to upstage them by hamming for the camera. I wish he'd do that more.

They then introduce the full In Memorium segment.

A single cello accompanies the black and white photographs that are projected. They are photos of;

Sir David Frost, Dennis Farina, Annette Funicello, Eydie Gorme, Dale Robertson, Larry Hagman, Leslie Frankenheimer, Conrad Bain, Maxine Stuart, Lee Thompson Young, Preston Davis, Alan Kirschenbaum, James Loper, Lou Myers, Milo O'Shea, Fran Bascom, Lois Smith, Roger Ebert, Emily Squires, Bonnie Dore, Eileen Brennan, Bonnie Franklin, Russell Means, Milt Hoffman, Jack Shea, Jeanne Cooper, Allan Arbus, Henry Bromell, David Connell, Charles Durning, Richard Matheson, Harry Carey Jr, Ken Venturi, Pat Summerall, Steve Sabol, Alex Karras, Jack Klugman, Jenni Rivera, Eddie Michaels, Michael Ansara, Charles Lisanby, Fay Kanin, Emenuel Steward, Ray Dolby, Julie Harris, Deborah Raffin, Patti Page and finally Andy Williams.

Anna Faris and Allison Janney continue with another award.

And the Emmy goes to: James Cromwell (American Horror Story: Asylum)

NPH says ... something ... as we return from an ad but technical issues mean only those in the room know what it was.

And the Emmy goes to: Abi Morgan (The Hour)

We've seen all the Drama awards except the big one. Will Breaking Bad and House of Cards miss out on the big gong as well?

Edie Falco comes on stage to remember James Gandolfini.

She points out that many people struggle to believe Tony Soprano wasn't who he was.

She says he was kind, uniquely generous and uncomfortable with the attention he got.

"Over the years I was particularly moved by Jim's devotion to his family."

"You all knew James Gandolfini the actor, I was lucky enough to know Jim the man. For ten years as his close colleague and pretend life partner. It's Jim the man, the very dear man, that I will miss most of all."

NPH introduces Alyson Hannigan and Cobie Smulders who may or may not have been smuggled in as part of his contract to do this gig.

And the Emmy goes to: The Colbert Report

Stephen Colbert: Pointing the way.

Tim Gunn and Heidi Klum appear to present the award:

No, that's not a typo, they got four of the nominations.

And the Emmy goes to: Derek Hough, Dancing With the Stars

The Emmy for choreography has been presented for years in secret it seems. It's not clear if there were robes and masks or just a complete lack of cameras.

This year NPH goes reality show on the choreographers, storms in to their "certificate presentation" and demands they finally do their stuff in the show.

He also insists he is in it.

So we get another number.

NPH is spotlit against a red wall with black gloved hands sticking out of it. He's singing Luck Be A Lady and well, if you had to choose a host to highlight the choreograpy he'd be it.

The music transitions into a mash-up of TV themes: Mad Men, Game of Thrones, American Horror Story.

All with NPH's Luck be a Lady. There are dancers doing interpretations of the shows and this just looks fantastic. The Horror Story dancing gimps are a particular favourite.

Then we mash Boardwalk Empire with Get Lucky and it all gets a little Gatsby.

Breaking Bad just gets chemical which seems apt, while The Big Bang Theory reinterpreted in dance is, well, a lot cooler than the four nerds of the show's normal cast.

Finally it morphs into a huge stage number with dancers in front of the words "Chroeography Emmys" and the result gets a big cheer.

Awkwardly those at the back of the room stand and applaud but the stars down the front sit. It's almost like this is a technical award that they don't think belongs here.

"The Emmys are so good this year" begins Stephen Colbert.

He thanks the Daily Show for setting the standard and thanks the people he is standing with for giving him "the stupidest things to say."

"We want to thank anyone who's willing to come on and talk to that stupid guy I play on TV."

He also thanks his wife for "being so cruel and sexy."

Another award!

And the Emmy goes to: Don Roy King, Saturday Night Live

Jim Parsons and Bob Newhart come out to present an award and when Parsons acknowledges the honour of appearing with him, the room breaks out into what appears to be a sincerely spontaneous standing ovation.

The two comedians play at being awkward.

"You do have good timing" says Parsons of Newhart who points out the award he won in 1962 is about to be presented.

And the Emmy goes to: The Colbert Report

Stephen Colbert: Pointing the way.

And one joke about Under The Dome being about the White house later we race into a recap of the Outstanding Guest Actor and Actress awards that lets the winners once again present a "proper" award.

That proper award is:

And the Emmy goes to: David Fincher (House of Cards)

Fincher, who wins for the pilot episode, isn't here to accept so the not-proper-winners get to accept on his behalf.

Kevin Spacey and Robin Wright in House of Cards.

Claire Danes starts out by thanking the writers, and specifically dedicating her award to Homeland's award winning writer who died this year.

She thanks her husband for making her happy "so I can be so entirely unhappy in the world of fantasy."

NPH introduces "the moment you've all been waiting for" the accountants of Ernst & Young.

Bob Newhart comes out with them and does his confused old guy schtick. It's good.

They don't say anything. Thank you Emmys.

Jimmy Fallon comes out then to introduce an award into a stand microphone of rapidly diminishing height.

ACTRESS IN A DRAMA
Claire Danes (Homeland)
Vera Farmiga (Bates Motel)
Michelle Dockery (Downton Abbey)
Robin Wright (House of Cards)
Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men)
Connie Britton (Nashville)
Kerry Washington (Scandal)

And the Emmy goes to: Claire Danes (Homeland)

Carrie, (Claire Danes) and Saul, (Mandy Patinkin) strut it out on Homeland.

Michael Idato: FROM OUR MAN IN THE ROOM

Jeff Daniels? Wow. Is it possible *both* Breaking Bad *and* House of Cards were robbed?

Rose Byrne's boyfriend just won an #Emmy. Australia can claim that one. Let's face it, we've claimed less ...

"Love of my life." Bobby Cannavale on Rose Byrne.

Diahann Carroll. #Emmys. #love #her

We must be behind as we race to another award.

And the Emmy goes to: Jeff Daniels (The Newsroom)

newsroom

As Bobby comes on stage the voice of the Emmys tells us he was a choir boy as a child, as apparently his ego was about to rage out of control so let's humiliate him.

Bobby clearly didn't expect to win as he really doesn't have a speech. He thanks the people he's sitting with and the people who sat him with them.

Then his family and the cast and crew in a very random order.

This is ok but mostly an ad for writing an acceptance speech.

Kerry Washington suggests the nominees for the following award have changed our understanding of the term Best Supporting Actor.

Not really, but they were good at it.

And the Emmy goes to: Bobby Cannavale (Boardwalk Empire)

There's been another award, which started with a very awkward Arrow-is-a-reality-show bit.

OUTSTANDING REALITY-COMPETITION PROGRAM

The Amazing Race
Dancing with the Stars
Project Runway
So You Think You Can Dance
Top Chef
The Voice

And the Emmy goes to: The Voice

The producer of The Voice accepts the award but gets his shows confused and uses his speech to ask people to vote on the show.

Michael Idato: FROM OUR MAN IN THE ROOM

The number in the middle of the show. Work. Of. Genius.

NPH says Twitter has grilled him for not doing a big song and dance number.

So he starts singing:

"The Emmy awards are three hour slong, there's still 90 minutes to go," he sings.

"The time is just right to sing you a song called The Number In The Middle Of The Show."

Here are some highlights from the lyrics:

"At this point the host could choose just to coast, I say no."

"Opening numbers are so old hat, even Hugh Jackman did stuff like that."

Then a line that might be a bit awkward given the previous In Memorium: "It's the number in the middle that gets me high."

So that's the singing, how about the dancing? NPH answers in song:

"Now without any further ado, here's some really sexy dancing in the middle of the number that's the Number In The Middle of the Show."

Which is the cue for the "Emmy gold dancers."

As they dance and shimmy Nathan Fillion and Sarah Silverman join NPH on stage.

"Neil when we saw you start singing we had to join in," says Fillion.

"You arranged this in the last 90 seconds?" asks NPH.

"We have great publicists," explains Silverman.

Then she takes that moment you always hoped would be taken at the Emmy Awards:

"We're completely live so I'm really going to try not to say 'vagina' on TV."

"I couldn't have not said it better myself," laughs NPH, in song.

"The Emmy awards are three hours long now there's three minutes less left to go," he continues as it wraps up.

NPH is singing and dancing and twirling on the back of a handsome mand and frankly this is a lot of fun!

"Sorry dudes, I just couldn't help myself" he says before handing over to an award.

Jane Lynch comes on stage to pay tribute to Cory Monteith.

"From the first time you saw Cory he had a star quality and a genuine sweetness that made it impossible not to fall in love with him."

"He was not perfect, which many of us here tonight can relate to."

His addiction is mentioned and Lynch is keen to ensure it isn't what he is remembered for however.

"This gifted and wonderful young man was worthy of your love," she says saying if we'd known him we'd have loved him even more.

"Henry tragically died earlier this year" we are told and his wife accepts the award with an emotional single line of thanks.

And then we move on to another award where "they all play dames, one of them is a Dame."

*CLUNK*

And the Emmy goes to: Anna Gunn (Breaking Bad)

That was fun which means it's time for another award.

It's another writing award, but no one wants these writers to do a bit to camera. They're too serious.

And the Emmy goes to: Henry Bromell (Homeland)

The cast of How I Met Your Mother are here for a public service announcement about a major problem.

EHD - Excessive Hosting Disorder.

"The symptoms of EHD appear in a HOST of ways" says Ted.

And now we're in a faux out-take from HIMYM.

"Last week I walked in on Neil naked and hosting himself" says Jason Segel.

HIMYM then stage a hosting intervention. Arsenio Hall hosts.

They send NPH off to the Ryan Seacrest Centre for Excessive Hosting for treatment. Arsenio goes too.

It's a nice bit.

Now that we've seen all the comedy awards EXCEPT Best Comedy, have you changed your mind?

Who will win?

Douglas and Damon are back immediately afterwards.

"In the words of Liberace 'too much of a good thing is wonderful'" says Douglas.

And we're on to the drama awards.

And the Emmy goes to: Laura Linney (The Big C: Hereafter)

Elton John remembers Liberace's influence on his music and his wardrobe.

"What I was not aware of until years later was his lifestyle ... yeah right."

He's written a new song Home Again with Bernie Taupin to pay tribute to a man who had a big impact "on me and people like me."

It has a stormy (no really, there's wind sound effects) piano intro. The silhoette of a choir promises more to come though.

Michael Idato: FROM OUR MAN IN THE ROOM

Gail Mancuso. Second woman ever to win best directing in comedy. Long overdue.

Screening past Emmys clips during the break, inc. Mary Tyler Moore, Kermit and Miss Piggy.

"I know for a fact that Jimmy Kimmel is excited to be presenting the next award with them ... I mean her. Please welcome Jimmy Kimmel and Sofia Vergara."

The pair then explain that laughter is in fact the worst medicine, contrary to popular belief, and introduce the award for Best Murderer in a Comedy Series.

And the Emmy goes to: Jim Parsons (The Big Bang Theory)

Gail Mancuso accepts the award for Outstanding Directing For A Comedy Series for Modern Family. Photo: Reuters

Melissa Leo, who earlier (read: not on air) won the Emmy for Best Guest Actor in a Comedy, comes on stage to present an award that is important enough to make the ceremony proper. That seems a bit mean really.

The Emmy goes to: Gail Mancuso (Modern Family)

Jon and Alec managed a VERY subdued announcement there.

Tony Hale lurks over Julia's shoulder silently as she speaks and it gets a lot of laughs. He's holding her purse.

He prompts her when she too gets faux-nervous to thank her family.

"We love you so much" Hale says to her familly.

We cut away to see one of her other co-stars Anna Chlumsky is faux texting while she speaks.

Julia then just stands there for a while. It sounds drab but it actually works as a bit.

That's enough faux nervous though.

NPH is standing with the band to introduce "my biological parents" Jon Hamm and Alec Baldwin.

Jon is wearing a big bushy beard. Alec is squinting at the auto-cue.

Jon says the hard-working alcoholic inspiration for Don Draper is "everyone else in Hollywood."

And the Emmy goes to: Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Veep)

Julia Louis-Dreyfus in Veep.

NPH introduces the Deschanel sisters (Zooey and Emily) with the spectacular line "this two sister act is very different to the one I saw in Thailand a few years ago" while making a number of ping pong noises. You join the very, very wrong dots.

They're here to present an award. No ping pong.

And the Emmy goes to: Tony Hale (Veep)

Emmys winner for Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series, Tony Hale ( Veep). Photo: Getty Images

Tracey Wigfield thanks her parents because she knows they like Louie, while Tina Fey chastises her "no one said you were allowed to talk."

The nominees for comedy writing were "forced" to open up about their work in the form of interviews to camera.

"I'm a million times funnier than Louis" says Louis C.K.'s Louie co-writer Pamela Adlon. "Then again so is a bag of anything."

"That's going to get cut for time" says Tina Fey "I'm not doing that."

Which cues the award.

And the Emmy goes to: Tina Fey and Tracey Wigfield (30 Rock)

Actress Merritt Wever accepts the award for Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series for her role in Nurse Jackie. Photo: Reuters

Amy and Tina are then invited up to present an award and introduced as being from 30 Rock, Parks and Recreation and "that bit we just did."

SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY
Mayim Bialik (The Big Bang Theory)
Jane Lynch (Glee)
Sofia Vergara (Modern Family)
Julie Bowen (Modern Family)
Merritt Wever (Nurse Jackie)
Jane Krakowski (30 Rock)
Anna Chlumsky (Veep)

And the Emmy goes to: Merritt Wever (Nurse Jackie)

Which cues Jimmy Kimmel coming on stage to suggest NPH takes it in "because they may not ask you back."

AND IT'S HOST-A-PALOOZA

Jane Lynch comes on stage to say she wasn't invited back because she was a woman.

"I don't think anyone who saw you host that night thought of you as a woman," quips NPH.

NPH and Jane Lynch then contemplate "showing how much of a woman I am," which permits them to compare notes as to who would like that less. Heh. Nice.

Who else is going to turn up? Jimmy Fallon to tap dance. Then Conan comes out to say he hosted when it counted.

Could this get any more surreal? Yes.

"Look at that parade of blabbering buffoons," says Kevin Spacey from his seat straight to camera, clearly channeling his character from House of Cards. "Getting them all to sabotage Neil was too easy."

He suggests there is more to come and we hope so.

"Has anyone else got any crazy advice for me?" asks NPH having dismissed the cabal of comedy hosts.

"Yeah we do," say Tina Fey and Amy Poehler from the front row while chewing on pop corn. "Take your pants off."

"That would be degrading," says NPH.

"But we would be de-grateful" says Poehler.

They are also wearing 3D glasses to see what he's working with.

Essentially the hosting just got pre-emptively undermined. Emmy hosts are a strongly bonded lot.

And finally we're under way with Neil Patrick Harris and a nameless security guard in a court room style building.

It turns out NPH intends to binge watch an entire season of television. That amounts to a LOT of televisions and clips from tonight's nominees.

NPH has a bit of an episode after a while and now there's an edit of all the shows first talking to him, then singing for him. Notably the show doing most of the singing is NPH himself as host of the Tony Awards.

We transition into all of the talent show judges yelling at each other and NPH thinking they are talking to him.

Essentially that's the theme of this rather surreal opening. NPH thinks the TV is talking to him, en masse.

Fox 8 interupts your normal schedule of unrelenting Simpsons to bring you five seconds of the audience warm-up guy at the Emmy Awards before realising that something has gone terribly wrong.

So instead they offer us an ad for Australia's Next Top Model, something differently wrong.

And which drama do you think will give an earnest speech of thanks tonight? It's not actually the last awards that Breaking Bad will be eligible for, but the industry might be wanting to get sentimental about our favourite drug dealer. Or is it time for the internet series to dominate?

Amid all the in memoriums and comparisons to Ricky Gervais, a few gongs are going to be handed out today. Let's find out who will win, according to the real experts - you!

Which comedy is going to be laughing all the way to the stage?

Here's the full list of Emmy nominations that will be announced today.

DRAMA SERIES
Breaking Bad
Downton Abbey
Game of Thrones
Homeland
House of Cards
Mad Men

ACTOR IN A DRAMA
Hugh Bonneville (Downton Abbey)
Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad)
Jeff Daniels (The Newsroom)
Jon Hamm (Mad Men)
Damian Lewis (Homeland)
Kevin Spacey (House of Cards)

ACTRESS IN A DRAMA
Claire Danes (Homeland)
Vera Farmiga (Bates Motel)
Michelle Dockery (Downton Abbey)
Robin Wright (House of Cards)
Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men)
Connie Britton (Nashville)
Kerry Washington (Scandal)

WRITING FOR A DRAMA
George Mastras (Breaking Bad)
Thomas Schnauz (Breaking Bad)
Julian Fellowes (Downton Abbey)
David Benioff and D.B. Weiss (Game of Thrones)
Henry Bromell (Homeland)

DIRECTING FOR A DRAMA
Tim Van Patten (Boardwalk Empire)
Michelle MacLaren (Breaking Bad)
Jeremy Webb (Downton Abbey)
Lesli Linka Glatter (Homeland)
David Fincher (House of Cards)

SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A DRAMA
Bobby Cannavale (Boardwalk Empire)
Jonathan Banks (Breaking Bad)
Aaron Paul (Breaking Bad)
Jim Carter (Downton Abbey)
Peter Dinklage (Game of Thrones)
Many Patinkin (Homeland)

SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA
Anna Gunn (Breaking Bad)
Maggie Smith (Downton Abbey)
Emilia Clarke (Game of Thrones)
Christine Baranski (The Good Wife)
Morena Baccarin (Homeland)
Christina Hendricks (Mad Men)

COMEDY SERIES
The Big Bang Theory
Girls
Louie
Modern Family
30 Rock
Veep

ACTOR IN A COMEDY
Alec Baldwin (30 Rock)
Jason Bateman (Arrested Development)
Jim Parsons (The Big Bang Theory)
Matt LeBlanc (Episodes)
Louie C.K (Louie)
Don Cheadle (House of Lies)

ACTRESS IN A COMEDY
Tina Fey (30 Rock)
Laura Dern (Enlightened)
Lena Dunham (Girls)
Edie Falco (Nurse Jackie)
Amy Poehler (Parks and Recreation)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Veep)

WRITING FOR A COMEDY
David Crane and Jeffrey Klarik (Episodes)
Louis C.K. and Pamela Adlon (Louie)
Greg Daniels (The Office)
Jack Burditt and Robert Carlock (30 Rock)
Tina Fey and Tracey Wigfield (30 Rock)

DIRECTING FOR A COMEDY
Lena Dunham (Girls)
Paris Barclay (Glee)
Louis C.K. (Louie)
Gail Mancuso (Modern Family)
Beth McCarthy-Miller (30 Rock)

SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A COMEDY
Adam Driver (Girls)
Jesse Tyler Ferguson (Modern Family)
Ed O'Neill (Modern Family)
Ty Burrell (Modern Family)
Bill Hader (SNL)
Tony Hale (Veep)

SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY
Mayim Bialik (The Big Bang Theory)
Jane Lynch (Glee)
Sofia Vergara (Modern Family)
Julie Bowen (Modern Family)
Merritt Wever (Nurse Jackie)
Jane Krakowski (30 Rock)
Anna Chlumsky (Veep)

MINISERIES OR MOVIE
American Horror Story: Asylum
Behind the Candelabra
The Bible
Phil Spector
Political Animals
Top of the Lake

ACTOR IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Michael Douglas (Behind the Candelabra)
Matt Damon (Behind the Candelabra)
Toby Jones (The Girl)
Benedict Cumberbatch (Parade's End)
Al Pacino (Phil Spector)

ACTRESS IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Jessica Lange (American Horror Story: Asylum)
Laura Linney (The Big C: Hereafter)
Helen Mirren (Phil Spector)
Sigourney Weaver (Political Animals)
Elisabeth Moss (Top of the Lake

WRITING FOR A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Richard LaGravenese (Behind the Candelabra)
Abi Morgan (The Hour)
Tom Stoppard (Parade's End)
David Mamet (Phil Spector)
Jane Campion and Gerard Lee (Top of the Lake)

DIRECTING FOR A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Steven Soderbergh (Behind the Candelabra)
Julian Jarrold (The Girl)
David Mamet (Phil Spector)
Allison Anders (Ring of Fire)
Jane Campion and Gerard Lee (Top of the Lake)

SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
James Cromwell (American Horror Story: Asylum)
Zachary Quinto (American Horror Story: Asylum)
Scott Bakula (Behind the Candelabra)
John Benjamin Hickey (The Big C: Hereafter)
Peter Mullan (Top of the Lake)


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